From five years to over two decades together, these married couples share their advice on how to make love last.
From five years to over two decades together, these married couples share their advice on how to make love last.
It’s a question every married couple ponders: What is the secret to making your relationship last? Each long-term partnership is different, with its own secret to success. Marriage advice varies from couple to couple, we can learn a few things from lovebirds who have been together for the better part of a decade (or two!). Here’s hoping their tips inspire you to find something that helps your relationship today, tomorrow or forever.
“I fell in love with my husband when I was just 15”
Christina & Ivan
At 13, Christina Lin and Ivan Hoe became fast friends and two years later, a couple. While some may question whether two teens can truly be in love at such an young age, the childhood sweethearts defied all odds to tie the knot in 2011. After a 14 year-long courtship, the duo (now 34) have been married for five and a half years.
“It’s not easy for a relationship to last so long, especially when you start dating young, because it’s inevitable that people will change along the way. Your circumstances and environment changes as well as you grow older and your expectations of each other start to differ,” says Christina. Their secret? “Good communication is key,” the couple reveals.
“We used to chat for hours over the phone, talking about all sorts of topics from current affairs to sports,” says Christina. “Now that we’re married, we still make time to ask each other how our day went over dinner, or before bedtime.”
“Life will present good and bad, but as a family we must be strong”
Jessie & Andre
Singapore Airlines inflight supervisor Andre Png remembers meeting his wife, chief stewardess Jessie, for the very first time back in 1987. “I was at the training centre chatting to my instructor, and that’s when I noticed her. She was tanned, had hazel eyes and nice lips,” he reminisces.
After almost 30 years with the company and 25 years of marriage, the couple remain close. Despite a busy flight schedule, they keep things flexible in order to have as much family time as possible with their two boys. “After we had children, someone had to be at home, so Jessie took on the role of ‘flying mother’, where she spent seven-and-a-half years doing turnaround flights, flying to destinations like Jakarta and back so there would be a parent at home every day,” says Andre.
“At the end of the day, we just need to work around our schedules. Birthdays, anniversaries and other occasions just need a little more planning than usual,” Jessie adds. Unplanned events do occur to test their bond. “Six years ago, our son Mark had a retinal detachment and needed surgery immediately. Jessie was in Perth and I in Cairo but one phone call to the company and I was on the next flight home,” says Andre. “Life will present its moments, good and bad, but as a family we must be strong.”
“When times get rough, remember why you fell in love in the first place… Always trust that your spouse has your back”
Andrea & pierre
Andrea De Cruz and Pierre Png are the quintessential loved-up celebrity couple. Married for 13 years since 2003, the path to everlasting romance wasn’t always easy for the pair, with Andrea suffering from liver failure in 2002 after taking slimming pills. In swooped Pierre, who selflessly donated part of his liver to save his then-girlfriend, and the pair have never looked back since.
Having weathered the storm together, Andrea shares what has made their union last so long: “When times get rough, remember why you fell in love in the first place. Remember opposites attract, and finding someone just like you is not always the best thing. Listen and make sense of what the other person is saying - your opinion is not the only one that matters.
Always trust that your spouse has your back.” Says Pierre: “I always remind myself to treat Andrea as an individual. I cannot expect her to do things the way I would, or how I would want her to. I love her, and it is my choice to continue loving her. I tell myself our differences are not because she’s a problem, but because she’s a mystery!”
“ We do silly things to make each other laugh”
Maggie & Louis
Maggie Mok was just 19 when she found love. The boy? Louis Lin, also 19, whom she says was never the kind of guy she imagined herself with. Twelve years on, the pair found themselves exchanging vows in 2015. “I started working while he was still studying and I slowly felt like we were growing apart, but he didn’t want to let me go because he already knew I was the one for him,” she shares.
“I gradually realised that I had grown to be a more patient and loving person with him by my side.” Her advice: Instead of looking for someone better, look for someone who can make you better. These days, the contented couple keep it simple when it comes to romance. “We do silly things to make each other laugh. I think laughter can sustain a relationship through the not-sohappy times in life and remind you why you fell in love with your spouse,” says Maggie.
Photo: Veronica Tay /SPHM / grooming : leny/palette inc.
