LEAVE MY FOOD ALONE!

Excuse me, but can’t a girl order a steak or whiskey without some arbitrary label insinuating that that’s not what we’re supposed to have?

So here’s the thing: I’m open to debate when it comes to having things made gender-specific. Different toys for boys and girls? I personally find it ridiculous, but hey, it’s your kid. Genderspecific colours such as pink and blue? Equally ludicrous, but it’s your life. However, when these completely arbitrary labels start encroaching on our dining preferences, that’s when I get all “you’ve gotta be kidding me”. Not long ago, I came across a restaurant promoting its “ladies-only” menu. The restaurant was renowned for its hearty red meat dishes, but this menu featured only salads and white meat options. A colleague found her Valentine’s Day menu at another establishment basically made up of rabbit food, never mind that it cost just as much as her date’s – his came with all the carnivorous options. And don’t even get me started on the syrupy-sweet drinks that dominate many a ladies’ night drinks list.

My question to these restaurants: Why? What is the point? You probably did it with good intentions, but why on earth would you presume to know every woman’s wining and dining preferences by putting these sorts of restrictions in place? If there’s some kind of societal standard that women are all cocktail-sipping, diet-watching dainty eaters, then many of us have definitely missed the memo. Granted, these examples don’t crop up all that often anymore, and I know it sounds like I’m overreacting, but the insidious effects of tagging gender to certain types of food is often farreaching and long-lasting. Ever ordered a steak and had people make passiveaggressive “wow, you can really eat, huh?” remarks, or comment that “you drink like a man” because you’d rather have a whiskey over a fruity cocktail? It may just sound patronising, but in the long run, it inadvertently helps create a toxic culture where women are expected to dine a certain (unthreatening) way, and where people make fun of men for ordering a “girlie” drink. This form of arbitrary gender stereotyping, such as expecting women to be in certain jobs and play certain roles in the household, all contribute to the sexist narrative – that women should toe the line or be shamed for not doing so. There may be a study or two out there that insists men and women gravitate towards different flavour profiles or have differing appetites. But the bottom line is, we’re not all the same, and we’re adults who don’t need to be told what and how to eat. Really, what’s the upside in putting gender restrictions on food? Lots of things in this world are already arbitrarily linked to gender. Can’t we please just leave food alone? Let the men who want to have a lychee martini, or the women who want to share a 1kg T-bone steak at dinner, do what they want to do! We’ll all be happier for it.

“We’re not all the same, and we’re adults who don’t need to be told what and how to eat.”