Now that your twins are preschoolers, you’ll begin to see how different they are. Celebrate them as individuals, advises DR RICHARD C. WOOLFSON.
Now that your twins are preschoolers, you’ll begin to see how different they are. Celebrate them as individuals, advises DR RICHARD C. WOOLFSON.
Just when you think one baby will be challenging enough, along come two! You are not alone in having twins, however – the birth rate for twins has steadily increased over the past decade or so, mainly as a result of successful fertility treatments.
As you have discovered, twins can be twice the usual expense and twice the usual work – but also twice the usual fun! And that makes family life very special for you. Here are 10 things your should know about parenting twins:
Twins tend to “run” in families
A woman who is a twin is more likely to give birth to twins than one who has no family history of twins. And a woman who conceives after the age of 40 is four times more likely to have twins, compared to a 20-year-old.
They are physically tiring
The most common complaint of parents of twins is the physical strain of managing two sleeping and feeding schedules simultaneously. You need a lot of energy to keep up with the routines of two different babies of the same age, at the same time.
Identical twins are not identical
Although they look the same to most other people, you’ll probably notice some differences. For instance, frequently one twin is left-handed, while the other is right-handed, and the left- handed child is likely to be the smaller of the two; the children often develop different styles of handwriting and have their own personalities.
They can devise a secret language
They may communicate with each other in a way that you don’t understand. However, there are instances when siblings who are not twins, but who are close in age, also develop a secret spoken code for the deliberate purpose of excluding adults. It’s their special connection.
Balance their similarities with their differences
Each twin should be allowed to become a unique individual, to develop their own particular blend of characteristics, skills and talents. So, do your best to encourage them to grow in their unique ways, even though that can be very demanding to achieve.
Each has to learn to stand on their own two feet
Temporary separation from each other has to happen at some stage in their lives. The start of playgroup, kindergarten or school may be the point when you decide to specifically encourage their individual identities, perhaps by placing them in different classes.
They may have different interests
For example, one might enjoy stories, while the other prefers jigsaws. Your challenge is to provide opportunities to meet these different interests when possible, even though this can be costly (because they don’t share the same equipment) and hectic (because they have different schedules).
They may need support to develop their social skills
Your twins may have difficulty mixing with others their own age when they reach the preschool stage, because they are so used to being with each other, and they may need extra help from you when settling in to playgroup or nursery.
Language-based activities are important
Talking, singing to them, and reading them stories are especially important, as research shows that twins often develop language at a slower rate than non- twins. So, the more you stimulate their language skills, the better.
Each kid needs to feel special
Although they are twins, they are also individuals. Try to spend some time alone with each child regularly, rather than spending time only with them together. All it takes is a few minutes of your time alone with each of them every day, to make them both feel they are important.
Try to spend some time alone with each child regularly, rather than spending time only with them together.
