5 steps to beat cyber bullies

Keep your children safe and happy with expert advice from a counsellor

Modern Family’s Ariel Winter cites Internet bullies as one of the reasons for undergoing breast reduction surgery.

One in three children in Singapore have been cyber bullied, according to a survey by Microsoft. But do you understand what cyberbullying is and how to spot the signs? What should you do if your child is a victim? Chong Ee Jay, manager of TOUCH Cyber Wellness says it is essential that parents are aware of this growing problem. “Cyberbullying is using the Internet or other digital technologies to deliberately or intentionally cause harm to others. This includes harassing, gossiping, cyber stalking or impersonating someone online,” says Ee Jay. Common cyberbullying scenarios in Singapore include: “Trolling” (purposely sowing discord in Internet groups), passing abusive and derogatory comments, gossiping and spreading rumours, excluding victims from instant message groups, manipulating or altering photos of victims, cyber stalking and harassing.

How To Tell If Your Child Is Being Bullied?

The online realm may seem like foreign territory, but parents can still be alert to possible cyberbullying by staying attuned to changes in their kids’ behaviour, attitudes, and school grades. “If your child suddenly receives failing grades, unexpectedly stops using the computer, appears angry, depressed or frustrated after using the computer, withdraws from friends, avoids talking about what he’s doing online, feels uneasy about going to school or going out in general, and gets nervous or jumpy when a text or notification message appears – these are things to watch out for and to act upon,” advises Ee Jay.

A modern issue in Modern Family: Parents dealing with their typical teenage kids glued to the Internet and vulnerable to cyber bullies

What To Do If Your Child Is A Victim Of Cyberbullying?

1 “GOOGLE” YOUR CHILD Look for any fake profile of your child on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, or any webpage that shows personal information. Repeat this search in Quotes and Images.

2 KEEP PROOF “Have your child save the messages, print the emails or instant conversations and report the abuse to the service provider like Twitter and Facebook,” says Ee Jay. You can also report it via the Webpage Removal Request Tool through Google and contact the webmaster to remove the information.

3 BLOCK THE Bully “The most important thing you should do first is to block the perpetrator and change your child’s privacy settings,” reminds Ee Jay. Social media platforms allow you to do this.

4 TALK TO A GROWN-UP “Get the child to speak to an adult they trust right away. If that can’t be a parent, enlist a professional counsellor from TOUCH Cyber Wellness, or approach your child’s school’s counsellor to support the child through it,” recommends Ee Jay.

5 REPORT THE BULLY “If the online bully starts sending threatening messages or emails, this qualifies as a case of criminal intimidation,” says Ee Jay.