I just know it’s a girl

Sorry, it’s another boy, and now you’re not looking forward to your new baby. It’s time to stop dwelling on your disappointment, says DR RICHARD C. WOOLFSON.

Portrait of Tammy Strobel

Sorry, it’s another boy, and now you’re not looking forward to your new baby. It’s time to stop dwelling on your disappointment, says DR RICHARD C. WOOLFSON.

It really doesn’t matter if you have sons or daughters. What’s important is that they are healthy, and grow up to be confident and happy.
It really doesn’t matter if you have sons or daughters. What’s important is that they are healthy, and grow up to be confident and happy.

After having two boys, you were really hoping for a little girl. You did everything you could to skew the gender of your new baby, from timing when you should have sex to eating certain types of food. But the fifth-month scan has shown that you’re expecting another son. While you are grateful to be able to conceive another child, you can’t help but feel disappointed that you won’t have a daughter in the family. Now in the third trimester of your pregnancy, you have completely lost enthusiasm for the new arrival. It’s time to change your outlook to a more positive perspective. Remind yourself that:

Every child is a blessing

After having two boys, you were really hoping for a little girl. You did everything you could to skew the gender of your new baby, from timing when you should have sex to eating certain types of food. But the fifth-month scan has shown that you’re expecting another son. While you are grateful to be able to conceive another child, you can’t help but feel disappointed that you won’t have a daughter in the family. Now in the third trimester of your pregnancy, you have completely lost enthusiasm for the new arrival. It’s time to change your outlook to a more positive perspective. Remind yourself that:

A girl might not be what you expect

You have probably fantasised about bringing up a girl. But that’s just what you imagine it to be like – the reality could be quite different. There is no guarantee that a daughter would develop into the type of child you secretly hope for – for instance, she might not have the girlie personality that you expect her to have, and she might not be interested in dressing up. Since every child, boy or girl, is different, you might end up with unfulfilled expectations and disappointment.

Having only boys has practical advantages

Remind yourself of the pros of all your kids being boys, instead of feeling disappointed that you don’t have a girl. There are the obvious economic advantages. You can save money since they can share clothes, toys and games. Three boys can also share a bedroom more easily than two boys and a girl.

The boys are likely to bond well

Your two older sons might not be so excited about the baby duties, such as feeding and changing, but they will want to include their youngest brother in their activities as soon as he is old enough. Chances are, they will share common interests and enjoy playing together once they are a little older. You won’t have to go through that “I’m-notplaying- with-her-becauseshe’s- a-girl” phase, which almost inevitably arises at some point in a mixedgender family. Your baby will also benefit from two older male siblings throughout his life – he could get advice on “guy issues” and learn from their experiences. This “we are brothers” attitude can be very helpful throughout their childhood.

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