Got a relationship problem? JASON GODFREY, our man about town, is here to help.
Got a relationship problem? JASON GODFREY, our man about town, is here to help.
I’ve been seeing a guy for two months. Last week, he lent me his phone to make a call, and the screen showed he’d been checking out his recent ex on Facebook. He said it was nothing and he has no feelings for her, but can I trust him?
Okay, have you never, ever checked out your ex-boyfriend on social media? Anyone who says no is either crazy or lying. Checking exes out is just curiosity. With social media, we have easy access to everyone – even those we may have cut out of our lives. I doubt there’s reason for concern, unless every time you use his phone, you see he’s on his ex’s page. If not, let him do his periodic checking-up, and don’t pretend you don’t do the same.
My boyfriend and I have been together for three months, but I still haven’t met his friends. Why hasn’t he introduced me to them? Is this weird, or some kind of sign?.
It could be a sign that he doesn’t have friends, which would be disconcerting. But in my opinion, you shouldn’t worry about it. There are myriad reasons why guys take a while to make these introductions, and it usually has to do with their dynamic with the other dudes. Chances are, he’s trying to figure out how and when to give you a glimpse into his “boy side”. Three months isn’t long, so chill, give it some time, gain his trust and enjoy having him all to yourself for now.
I’ve been with my man for six months. He paid for dinner on our first three dates. Since then, we’ve split the bill. When I mentioned this to my girlfriends, they were outraged. I didn’t think it was bad – this is the modern world – but am I being stupid?
I’m torn on this, because I think it is part of modern life. Today’s women are equal to males, and are out there with careers, doing way more productive stuff than most guys are, so why can’t we split the bill? That said, I personally have a hard time letting a girl pay for anything. Maybe it’s chauvinistic, but despite women wanting to be independent, I feel there’s a part of them that loves to be taken care of. Maybe we should all see that going Dutch is the way forward – but just let us buy you the odd gift every now and then.
My husband of six months expects me to do all the housework. We’ve argued about it, and he always agrees to help out more, but does it begrudgingly. As I have a full-time job, I’ve asked if we can get a helper, but he says it’s a waste of money. I’m finding it hard to keep our flat tidy and keep my career going.
Doing chores begrudgingly is the technique of the insolent teenager, so I feel your pain. Some people just aren’t as dedicated to cleanliness as others, but he should be helping you with the housework – you’re a team, which is what marriage is all about. Tell him he needs to muck in, but don’t berate him even if he does a poor job, as this will make the problem worse. If he continues to behave like an adolescent, tell him getting help will be money well spent because it could save your marriage.
Have more questions about men and their romantically obtuse ways? E-mail Jason at magherworld@sph.com.sg, follow him on Twitter (@bigsmilenoteeth) and like his Facebook page at www.facebook.com/ bigsmilenoteeth.
