ASK JAY

Got a relationship problem? JASON GODFREY, our man about town, is here to help.

My new boyfriend wants sex. All. The. Time. We’re talking every day, sometimes twice a day, and more at weekends. We get on well, fancy each other and the lovemaking is great, but I feel worn out! How do we strike a balance?

Two lines of thought: the first is, we all have differing sex drives and compromise is the key to a good relationship; the other is that we always want what we can’t have. So you owning the quantity of sex available means your man wants it whenever you can give it to him. Try oversexing him by giving him more than he can handle. This might curb his cravings. Let me know if it works – I haven’t tested my theory!

I’ve been seeing this guy for six months, and we’ve had many arguments over petty stuff , as frequently as every other day. If we’re having disputes so early on, should I make a hasty exit?

It’s a little late for a hasty exit, but an exit might be good. The honeymoon stage is super important. Science has proven that this stage will subside in every relationship, but it serves as a baseline for the rest of your time together. Remember how good it was in the very beginning to help transport you when things go bad. However, if you’re not happy now in what should be the happiest part of your relationship, I’m sad to say you probably need to find somebody else.

I’ve been married for a year. My husband was romantic in the beginning, but he never takes me out anymore. It’s not like we work crazy hours, it’s more that he can’t be bothered. I make suggestions, but he complains he’s tired and says I should hang with my girlfriends if I want to socialise. Is this marriage?

Expanding waistlines, decline of hygiene and a disregard of fashion are all symptoms of a victorious man. He fought the good fight on the dating scene, but now he’s got you, he’s stopped trying. This is what him no longer taking you out is about. Now you’re married, he thinks he doesn’t need to make an effort! Be calm and kind, but remind him that you both need to keep the relationship exciting for it to continue, and to do that, he has to work harder.

My partner is generally very attentive, but he often checks out other women on the street. I joke with him about it, but he pretends he’s not doing it and accuses me of mistrust. It makes me insecure and uncomfortable. What should I do?

Just as women can’t help checking out new clothes, we guys are wired to turn our heads at any hint of cleavage, skin… in fact, any warm body belonging to the opposite sex. That said, it doesn’t mean we’re not happy with our partners. Tell your man that you understand he’s going to look at other girls, but ask him not to be so obvious about it, because it’s upsetting you and making him look like a creepy perv (no guy wants that). Or start checking out hot guys that you walk past together, and see how he likes it…

Have more questions about men and their romantically obtuse ways? E-mail Jason at magherworld@sph.com.sg, follow him on Twitter (@bigsmilenoteeth) and like his Facebook page at www.facebook.com/bigsmilenoteeth.