Follow @sandrarileytang on Instagram and you’ll notice that being an avid yogi/crossfitter/all-around gym rat creeps into her feed a lot. So much so that you think – she’s got to be way too busy kicking butt to be worrying about how she looks, right? Well, nothing is ever as effortless as it seems, especially on social media. Here, Sandra shares her very own three-step approach to confidence and beauty.
Follow @sandrarileytang on Instagram and you’ll notice that being an avid yogi/crossfitter/all-around gym rat creeps into her feed a lot. So much so that you think – she’s got to be way too busy kicking butt to be worrying about how she looks, right? Well, nothing is ever as effortless as it seems, especially on social media. Here, Sandra shares her very own three-step approach to confidence and beauty.
They say that: ‘Comparison is the thief of happiness.’ Beauty to me is all about perspectives and awareness. As much as it’s easy for people to say, “You look beautiful exactly the way you are”, your perception of your own beauty changes. Sometimes, you can feel like the ugliest duckling in the world and other times you feel like a Disney princess. I may not have found the secret to beauty, but I feel that how beautiful you feel can be broken down into three main issues:
Skin: Zits and breakouts are probably one of the surest ways to break someone’s self-confidence. First, you panic when you notice a zit, and if someone were to point it out, a little part of your self-esteem runs away to hide in a closet with a tub of ice cream.
I’ve struggled with skin issues all my life, and though my skin has improved tremendously, I still have yet to achieve the kind of clear, porcelain skin that people on TV have. It’s really not as common as you think; many times, it’s really just the power of makeup. So don’t feel bad about yourself if you’re struggling with skin issues, too. Don’t hide behind a giant slab of makeup, either. Sometimes, all it takes is a change in your diet or cleansing routine to make all the difference.
Body: ‘I feel so fat’ has to be one of the most annoying yet common things said by anyone of any shape or size. The first thing you need to know is that you are not alone. Most women (and surely men, too) go in and out of ‘I hate my body’ phases.
Maybe try focusing on the real issue. Ask yourself if it’s a case of ‘I feel so fat as compared to this person’, or ‘I feel so sluggish and look like a sack of potatoes’. If it’s the former, stop comparing yourself to others. If it’s the latter, pat yourself on the shoulder; at least you’re at a stage of understanding your body and you can start working on getting your body to its best.
You can try all sorts of weird diets, remedies and pills, but really, nothing works better than a healthy diet and exercise. So stop trying to find alternatives and stop making excuses. Work on a programme for 21 days and if you manage to keep to it, you’ve just leveled up your mental strength. You’ll also probably be feeling and looking way better than you were three weeks ago.
Self-confidence: How is it possible that one day you’re looking in the mirror and you’re in major selfie mode because you think you actually look good and, just a couple of days later, you’re about to throw your phone at the same mirror because you think you look absolutely horrible while you contemplate ways to get a new face/body? 90 percent of the time, it’s really just in your head (or just really unflattering lighting).
As much as I’ve been saying not to compare yourself to others, it’s an on-going battle and a natural human instinct. So don’t be too hard on yourself. Be aware of when you’re allowing emotions to get the better of you and channel that energy into working to make a better you.
Identify what you like most about yourself and use that. If you’re thinking there’s nothing that fits that description, it’s clear you have major self-confidence issues. At least now you know what to start working on.
If you focus on one thing – whether it’s to have amazing skin/hair/eyes/ personality/body – and you choose to love yourself, sooner or later, people will see it too and love you for that. Just like music – if you make good music and love making it, the right people will see it one day.
Feeling beautiful all the time is almost impossible and way harder than we would like it to be. But sometimes, all we need is a little reminder, so in Goo Goo Dolls’ wise words, remember, ‘What you feel is what you are and what you are is beautiful.’
