Keep calm and have a good trip – Baby and his grandparents will do just fi ne with a little planning, says DR RICHARD C. WOOLFSON.
Age by stage 0-1 year
Lucky you – your in-laws have volunteered to take care of your little one for a whole week, so you and Hubby can go for a well-deserved holiday. How sweet of them! But now that the initial excitement has subsided, you’re worried about leaving Junior with them. After all, you often don’t agree with their baby-care style.
Don’t tie yourself in knots about this, however. Bear in mind that it is only a short break. Even if Grandma and Grandpa turn Baby’s usual routine upside down in every possible way, you’ll soon get your lives back to normal when you return.
So unless you have absolutely no trust in your in-laws’ parenting skills, accept their offer. Resist any thoughts of turning down this chance for you and your husband to have some “metime” together. And remember, they did a pretty good job raising him, didn’t they?
MA, HIS NAP TIMES ARE… There are lots of baby-care details to hand over so that they can follow his usual routine. Present this sensitively and in an easy-to-access format.
Emphasise that when Baby sticks to his routine, he is settled during the day and sleeps well at night.
Key information (such as what Baby has for each meal, when he usually eats, when he has naps, when he is bathed, and so on) should be clearly printed out for them in a size they can read. That’s much better than expecting them to remember every last detail of a verbal explanation.
When you give them this list, gently explain that it is not a set of orders or instructions, just a helpful outline. This would help them cope better. Chat with them about the schedule until you’re sure there are no misunderstandings, all the time emphasising that when your little one sticks to his routine, he is settled during the day and sleeps well at night.
Encourage them to ask questions and treat their enquiries seriously. At the bottom of the printout, provide a list of useful phone numbers, including those of your family doctor, emergency services, and perhaps a friend of yours who lives close by. Reassure them that they won’t need to use these contacts, but that they should keep them on hand just in case.
PLEASE DON’T SPOIL HIM
When it comes to the less pressing aspects – such as setting limits on his behaviour and restricting the amounts of sweets he gets – you’ll probably need to be realistic and be prepared to accept a compromise. After all, they are grandparents… and grandparents overindulge their grandchild at every opportunity! So, don’t expect too much.
By all means, explain how you would handle certain situations. For example, you might not rush to him the moment you hear him cry, or let him continue to play when it’s his mealtime. Suggest that they should try to respond in similar ways, but be ready for them to look after him in their own style.
Remember to respectfully thank your in-laws for giving you and your husband this wonderful chance to have a holiday together when Baby is still so young. When you are away, call or Facetime them every day for a friendly chat (not for an interrogation about everything they have or haven’t done!). Don’t forget to buy them a special gift for being so helpful. With such a positive approach, you’ll all benefit from the holiday.
