ARE YOU THE OFFICE ENEMY?

If you’re a boss, no one will tell you outright that you’re disliked – you have to read the signs. Here are four red flags that show you’re not as popular as you think.

Portrait of Tammy Strobel

If you’re a boss, no one will tell you outright that you’re disliked – you have to read the signs. Here are four red flags that show you’re not as popular as you think. 

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#1: They avoid eye contact

Take note of whether your staff are able to maintain eye contact with others, but not with you. “It’s a subconscious signal – they are hiding how they really feel about you,” says Jaya Dass, country manager of Randstad Singapore, a recruitment and HR services provider. Grace Lim, a human resource executive, adds: “I avoid eye contact with my boss because I feel that he has an authoritative air about him… I find him unapproachable and I’m afraid that if I were to look at him, he’d point out my faults at work.”

#2: They stop talking when you're around

It’s normal to engage in more workrelated topics in front of the boss. However, it’s a red flag if, instead of making a smooth transition to such topics, your employees cut the conversation once you enter the room. This shows that they do not consider you part of their group, says Jaya. “The moment my boss is nearby, my colleagues and I stop talking,” says Doris Kwoh, a customer service executive. “We feel very uncomfortable because we know that he’s staring at us.” What’s more, her boss once e-mailed her supervisor, remarking that Doris was “distracted at work” after he saw her chatting – no prizes for guessing why they clam up when he’s around.

#3: They give you short answers

It’s one thing for your employees to get straight to the point, but curt answers also show that your subordinates are uninterested in small talk. This could mean that they see you strictly as a “boss” and are drawing professional lines… or that they simply don’t like you and don’t want to build a relationship. Assistant manager Wanda Lau says: “I don’t want to have too much interaction outside of work, or build any relationship other than the employee-employer one, with my boss. I don’t see the need to be friends.”

#4: They're passive-aggressive

Few employees would confront their bosses head-on. Instead, they usually opt for passive-aggressive behaviour such as feigning ignorance about their bosses’ instructions or choosing not to act on them. “This shows that your employees do not respect you,” explains Jaya. They would rather go their own way than follow your lead.

GET YOUR TEAM TO WARM UP

Appreciate them. Recognise and hone your staff’s strengths (by sending them on courses, for example) and have their backs during trying moments – pitch in during busy periods, or shield them from unreasonable client requests.

Create fun moments to bond. “Bosses need to engage their staff on a level that is not solely workrelated,” says Jaya. Initiate activities like team meals, office parties and afterwork drinks.

Change your language. Not just in terms of your choice of words, but also your body language. Don’t interrupt or talk down to them. “Let them voice their opinions and listen with genuine interest. Don’t put down their ideas,” says Josh Goh, marketing director of recruitment and workforce solutions company Manpowergroup Singapore.